Front cover (750 x 550mm)
Red text: Triumphs of Sport and Speed
Pencil: Mistah Kurtz - he dead
Pen: 1p for the old guy
Page 1 - The Hollow Men (750 x 550mm)
We are the hollow men
We are the stuffed men
Headpiece filled with straw. Alas!
Our dried voices, when
We whisper together
Are quite meaningless
As wind in dry grass
Or rats' feet over broken glass
In our dry cellar
From The Hollow Men by T.S. Eliot
Page 2 - A Glam Rock Camelot (750 x 550mm)
He spoke and ceased: the lily maid Elaine,
Won by the mellow voice before she looked,
Lifted her eyes, and read his lineaments.
The great and guilty love he bare the Queen,
In battle with the love he bare his lord,
Had marred his face; and marked it ere his time.
(followed by the next thirteen lines)
From Lancelot and Elaine by Alfred Lord Tennyson
Page 3 - My First Gun (750 x 550mm)
They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra just for you.
From This Be The Verse by Philip Larkin
Page 4 - A Time Before Autism (750 x 550mm)
'Our punches got heavier as we became exhausted but I felt I had the edge in terms of fitness, so I summoned up all my strength and launched a massive haymaker......and missed. As I went down he caught me on my cheek with a blow that made a dull thud and would have knocked me out cold if I hadn"t been falling.'
From Two Bald Men Fighting Over a Comb
Page 5 - A James Bond Training Manual For Boys (750 x 550mm)
What did the chicken say when he crossed the road to meet James Bond? "The name's Ken, Chick-Ken."
Top tip: To avoid getting PTSD after brutally killing an enemy why not crack a joke? e.g. "I think he got the point" (death by spear gun)